


Once is an Accident (Three Times is a Pattern)

by sunshinexbomb



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Canon Compliant, Hand Jobs, M/M, Masturbation, Pining, accidental dick pics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-08
Updated: 2018-02-08
Packaged: 2019-03-15 08:58:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13609965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshinexbomb/pseuds/sunshinexbomb
Summary: Zhenya's about to turn his phone off and try to sleep when there’s a Snapchat notification from Burky.And then a phone call.“Hello?”“Don’t open that Snapchat,” Burky nearly screams in lieu of a hello.Zhenya blinks slowly, confused. “Why?”Burky is slow to answer until finally he admits, “It’s a picture of my dick.”--In which Evgeny gets enough "accidental" pictures of Andre's dick that he's starting to think it's not much of an accident.





	Once is an Accident (Three Times is a Pattern)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chartreuser](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chartreuser/gifts).



> For Coco for no reason other than she deserves nice things always. Hope you enjoy this!
> 
> Thanks Kassie for the beta. All other mistakes are my own.

It’s late, nearly midnight, and Zhenya is still awake, exhausted but wired from the game earlier that night. He’s scrolling through Instagram without much attention, occasionally sending posts to Dima, and he’s about to turn his phone off and try to sleep when there’s a Snapchat notification from Burky.

And then a phone call. 

"Hello?”

“Don’t open that Snapchat,” Burky nearly screams in lieu of a hello.

Zhenya blinks slowly, confused. “Why?”

Burky is slow to answer, and if his breathing wasn’t so heavy, Zhenya would’ve thought he’d hung up. Finally, Burky admits, “It’s a picture of my dick.”

“Excuse me?”

“I didn’t mean to send it to you. I just - picked the wrong contact. Kuzy, please don’t open it,” Burky pleads.

“Well, now I have to,” Zhenya says, voice surprisingly steady even as he’s trying to hold back his laughter.

“Kuzy.”

“Burky, I see your almost dick every day. Who else will be better judge if this picture is good?”

“I will literally pay you not to open it.”

“I have bigger contract than you, money is not important. Also, I’m already opening it.”

Burky groans as Zhenya pulls up Snapchat. The Snap is only a few seconds long, so Zhenya doesn’t get a great look. Mostly it’s dark and the angle is bad and Zhenya can just barely make out the shape of Burky’s hand wrapped around the base of his dick. Overall, not the best he’s seen.

“I give maybe four out of ten,” he concedes and Burky squeaks indignantly.

“Four? My dick is not a four.”

“Dick is fine,” Zhenya says, “picture is no good. Too dark. You can barely see anything.”

“I’d like to see you take a better one.”

“Would you?” Zhenya asks, already toying with the waistband of his joggers. His dick is mildly interested in the idea. He wouldn’t mind. Zhenya’s always liked putting on a bit of a show.

Burky is quick to answer, though. “No! Keep it in your pants, Kuzy.”

Zhenya shrugs. “Your loss.”

Burky hangs out without a goodbye and Zhenya rolls his eyes. He tosses his phone aside, and it turns out taking a few minutes to quickly jerk one out is all he needed to get to sleep. 

\--

It happens again. This time without warning and in public.

Zhenya nearly chokes on his lunch when he opens Burky’s Snap, this time a much brighter picture that clearly shows the red tip of his dick and the hard length of it.

“What’s wrong with you?” Dima asks, and Zhenya is so glad he’s sitting across the table from him.

“Nothing,” Zhenya says hastily and quickly pulls up the chat on Snapchat. _what the fuck?_

Burky’s Bitmoji pops up in the corner immediately and is followed quickly by a _FUCK IM SO SORRY!!!!_

A second message comes up before Zhenya can respond. _was this one better at least?_

_i think 6/10 this time_. Zhenya responds and Burky sends back the middle-finger emoji.

“Who are you texting?” Dima asks suspiciously, looking over his lunch. Zhenya tries to school the smile on his face.

“Just Andre. No one interesting.”

Dima doesn’t look convinced, but Zhenya’s relieved he at least decides not to press any further. 

\--

After the third picture, Zhenya starts asking questions.

“Is Burky seeing someone?” he asks Nicky after practice one day and Nicky gives him a strange look.

“What? Like dating? Not that I know of. Why?”

The locker room’s nearly empty, Nicky packing up the last of his things into his bag. Other than him and Zhenya, there’s just a few others milling around: Carly showing Braden something on his phone and Jake and Madison laughing loudly at some story Beags is telling them with exaggerated hand motions. Burky had left just a bit ago with Djooser, Burky smiling brightly at Zhenya before heading out.

Zhenya doesn’t want to think about how the last time he’d seen that smile, it was through a grainy Snapchat photo with Andre’s cheeks flushed pink and his dick hard and leaking against his stomach. Zhenya had properly admonished him for sending pictures _with his face in them_ and then spent a little bit too long in the shower thinking about what Andre would look like if it was Zhenya’s hand wrapped around his dick instead.

“He send me like three pictures of his dick,” Zhenya says dryly and Nicky loses his grip on the tape in his hands.

“Gross,” Nicky says, which is probably a more appropriate reaction to have at the thought of your teammate’s dick instead of jerking off in the shower.

“It’s whatever, nothing I don’t see all the time,” Zhenya says, trying to shrug off the creeping shame that’s making his ears feel hot at the tips. Zhenya doesn’t get embarrassed about these kinds of things. “I was just wondering who he means to send pictures to. Didn’t think he had girlfriend or anything.”

Nicky shrugs, zipping up his bag. “He hasn’t told me about anyone he’s seeing. It’s probably just a hook-up. I’ll talk to him about it if it’s bothering you, though.”

Zhenya feels oddly relieved, which he doesn’t want to think about. For some reason, the idea of Andre having casual hook-ups is a bit easier to stomach than the thought of Andre actually dating anyone.

“No, I’ll talk to him, it’s fine,” Zhenya says, which is a blatant lie if he’s ever told one. He doesn’t intend on talking to Andre about this. Ever.

Zhenya has a high tolerance for embarrassment, but even he doesn’t want to have the _hey do you have a girlfriend or something because it may be that I want you to send those pictures to me on purpose instead of on accident_ conversation.

“Well, let me know if it becomes a problem,” Nicky says, shouldering his bag, but then stops. “Are they any good? The pictures?”

That’s not the question he was expecting, and Zhenya blushes a little.

“They’re so bad,” Zhenya says, which is mostly true. He keeps to himself that he’s jerked off to at least two of them. The last person that needs to know that is Nicky.

Nicky shakes his head like a disappointed father before heading out the locker room.

\--

Their next day off, Zhenya is woken up much too early by his phone ringing right by his head. Burky’s name and contact photo flashes across the screen.

“If you send me another picture of your dick, I’m going to send it to entire group chat and also anonymously to Russian Machine and also post on Twitter.”

“You wouldn’t do that,” Burky says incredulously.

“You want to wait and see?” Zhenya grumbles. His body hurts from a nasty hit he’d taken the night before and his head hurts from the drinks he’d had with Sasha and Dima and Zhenya could _really_ use a couple more hours of sleep.

“No! Also I didn’t send you anything, I just wanted to see if you wanted to go get breakfast with me. I was supposed to go with Carly but Bull is sick so he’s staying home. And Christian has friends in town he’s showing around and Jake and Madison had some sort of plans and -“

“I see, I’m just last resort,” Zhenya says, rolling over so he’s lying on his back. His room is still dark thanks to his blackout curtains, but the clock next to his bedside reads 8:32AM. He could definitely use a few more hours.

“No, last resort would be like. Papa.”

Zhenya knows that’s not true, but lets it go, covering his eyes with his forearm. “Well, I’m awake now and have nothing to do, so okay. But you pay.”

“I’ll come pick you up in twenty,” Burky says brightly, leaving Zhenya to reluctantly drag himself out of bed.

\--

There’s a brunch place in McLean that TJ has been harassing everyone to try out, so that’s where they go, if only to send a few pictures in the group chat and cool TJ’s incessant messages for a bit.

Andre drives too fast and he listens to terrible techno Swedish music and Zhenya’s pretty sure they ran at least one red light while driving through the empty Sunday morning streets. Despite that, Zhenya feels relaxed, if not a little bit groggy. It’s been a while since it’s been just him and Andre, long enough that Zhenya doesn’t even remember the last time they’d done this, and it’s. Well, it’s nice, if he’s being honest with himself.

They sit outside on the patio because it’s one of those unseasonably warm days that they shouldn’t be having in the middle of fucking January. Sometimes, Zhenya misses harsh winters and short days if only because they remind him of home, but most of the time he can’t complain about these random pockets of days when he can feel warm enough sitting outside in just a thick sweater and the sun against his face.

“Do you think this place is actually going to be good?” Andre asks, looking through the menu. He’s dressed similarly to Zhenya, but his sweater is stretching tight across his broad shoulders and Zhenya can just make out the shift of his muscles as he turns through the pages. It’s distracting to say the least.

Zhenya must take too long to answer, because Andre looks up at him and asks, “Kuzy? Did you hear what you said?”

“What? Yeah, sorry,” Zhenya says, giving his head a little shake. “No, it will probably be terrible because Osh recommends it,” he says.

Burky laughs, putting down his menu. “That sushi place he was going on about last time wasn’t so bad.”

“I think Chorns get food poisoning when we went there,” Zhenya says flatly, and that makes Burky laugh louder.

The food, it turns out, is not that bad. Andre orders a huge plate of waffles with fresh fruit and sticky-sweet syrup and absolutely nothing that would be nutritionist approved and Zhenya stays simple with a stuffed omelette and toast. They talk about nothing in particular and occasionally Andre swipes food off Zhenya’s plate despite Zhenya telling him about a hundred times not to. Sometimes, Zhenya gets distracted by Andre licking syrup from the corner of his mouth or the way the strawberries he’s eating make his lips turn pink, but he tries not to show it.

Zhenya’s always found Andre attractive because he’s not fucking blind. Andre has a distinct boyish charm that’s only gotten worse the more his confidence has grown the last few years. It didn’t used to be a problem, but then again, Zhenya didn’t used to know what Andre’s dick looked like when he was turned on either.

“Do you have any plans for the rest of the day?” Andre asks when they’re finishing up. He keeps his promise and fronts the bill and Zhenya tries not to think about how much this feels like a date.

“Not really,” Zhenya says with a shrug.

“Great. Do you want to go back to my place? We can, like, play video games or watch Netflix or something.”

Zhenya wonders if he should say no. He wonders if he should put a little distance between him and Andre before _I want to touch your dick_ turns into something along the lines of _I want to hold your hand the next time we have breakfast together_. Because Zhenya knows himself and he knows how quickly he can fall for someone, especially if it’s someone like Andre who Zhenya already knows inside and out from years of playing together.

Andre’s smile is warm, though, and Zhenya _knows_ that Andre hates having too much time to himself, and Zhenya is fucking weak so of course he says, “Yeah, sure, that sounds great.”

Andre’s smile grows larger, crinkling along his eyes, and Zhenya hates that it makes his heart beat just a little harder against his chest.

\--

During the All-Star Break, Zhenya gets two more pictures from Andre.

The first one is of Andre alone in his hotel room, sheets pooled around his hips, but obviously tented from his hard dick. It’s relatively tame compared to some of the others Zhenya’s gotten, but it still makes heat pool in his belly.

The other one is very much G rated, and honestly that one is even worse because it’s of Andre kissing the snout of a bottlenose dolphin and it’s one of the cutest things Zhenya’s ever fucking seen.

He doesn’t reply to either, but he does jerk off thinking about the first and he saves the second, setting it as Andre’s contact photo with a smile on his face.

\--

“Have you ever gotten a dick pic from Burky?” Zhenya asks Dima one day when they’re hanging out at Dima’s place after practice.

“I would hope not,” Varvara says from where she’s sitting curled up on a chair while Dima and Zhenya play video games together on the couch.

Dima snorts in laughter as Zhenya explains, “Not, like, on purpose. By accident, I mean.”

“No, but I get them from Sasha sometimes,” Dima says and Varvara looks up from her phone, pouting at him.

“And you don’t share them with me?”

Zhenya’s not sure if she’s kidding, and he’s too afraid to ask. Instead, he says, “I’ve gotten a bunch of them the last couple of months.”

“By accident?” Dima asks. “Is that what you’re always doing on the phone, then?”

Zhenya tries not to blush, but he can’t help it when Varvara laughs loudly. “Zhenya, once is an accident. If it’s been happening for _months_ he’s doing it on purpose.”

Somehow, that doesn’t make Zhenya feel much better.

\--

Their night in Columbus ends in a win, Nicky’s 200th goal, and a hotel night since there’s no practice scheduled for the next morning.

A few of them drag a reluctant Nicky out to a bar to celebrate his milestone, and Zhenya is very, very much tipsy when he gets back to his hotel room, leaving Sasha and TJ to chaperone an even tipsier Nicky who’s smiling and handsy now that he’s gotten a few shots in him.

Zhenya collapses onto his bed, not bothering to undress. He’s tired, but not enough to actually get to sleep, so he scrolls through his phone instead, laughing as he watches through the story on Nicky’s instagram showing an increasingly drunker Nicky downing celebratory drinks. He’s sure Sasha is the one taking the video, and that Nicky will kill him for it in the morning, but for now it’s great to see his flushed cheeks and his loud laughter as he tucks his face into Carly’s neck when TJ says something particularly funny.

It doesn’t take long for Zhenya to click through most of his apps, and he’s about to put his phone down when there’s a Snapchat notification from Andre.

This time it’s a video and Zhenya hesitates for a split second before opening it.

The video is dark and grainy, but Zhenya can tell Andre’s back in his hotel room. Zhenya’s breath hitches when he realizes what he’s seeing, that the video is of Andre’s hand wrapped around his dick, stroking it slowly. In the background, he can hear Andre’s muffled breathing, how harsh and unsteady it is and Zhenya nearly moans aloud himself.

Zhenya’s own dick is starting to harden in his jeans, and he presses against it with the heel of his palm for some much-needed pressure when the video plays again on a loop. Zhenya bites down on his lip, clicking on the screen of his phone to end the video before it starts a third time, and lays there, staring up at the ceiling of his hotel room.

Maybe it’s the drinks he’d had, but Zhenya’s mind is stuck on Varvara’s words, _he’s doing it on purpose_. Without thinking too hard about it, Zhenya kicks off his jeans and fumbles to push his briefs down halfway down his thighs as well. The picture he takes, his dick hard in his hand, is as bad as the one Andre had first sent him, but he sends it anyway, and then he waits.

The red arrow next to Andre’s name turns white almost immediately and it’s not long until he gets a message back. All it says is _4/10_ and Zhenya snorts.

Maybe Varvara was right then.

Before Zhenya can respond, he gets another video, this one a little brighter than before. Zhenya can more clearly make out Andre’s dick, how red the tip’s gotten, how Andre uses his own pre-come to slick himself up as he strokes it. Andre’s moans are louder and the sound goes straight to Zhenya’s own dick, which he starts to touch, matching Andre’s speed and rhythm as the video plays a second time.

Zhenya pushes his briefs the rest of the way down, turning on the lamp at his bedside for a bit more light. It’s difficult to take a video and touch himself at the same time, but Zhenya does the best he can, stroking his dick harder and rougher than Andre had been. Zhenya likes this better, never preferring to take it slow and easy on himself. He can feel the arousal in his belly starting to coil already, and he knows he’s close even if it’s only been just a few minutes.

The purple arrow next to Andre’s name turns white as soon as Zhenya sends the video and Zhenya starts to touch himself a little more slowly, waiting. There’s an edge of nerves creeping up under his skin as he keeps waiting, and Zhenya’s hand stills.

Fuck, what if he’s gotten this wrong?

Zhenya sighs in frustration, dropping his phone next to him and covering his face instead. He gives himself about a minute to feel stupid and embarrassed, his dick softening against his thigh, before he starts to pull his briefs back on.

Of course, Andre doesn’t actually want him, _of course_ Zhenya would make such a big fucking mistake, _of course_ -

Zhenya’s about to head into the ensuite to wash up and possibly drown himself in the shower, when there’s a knock at the door. He’s not particularly in the mood to see someone, not with the disappointment still heavy in his stomach, and especially if it’s a drunk teammate who’s forgotten his keycard, but he opens it anyway, surprised to see Andre on the other side.

“Why’d you put clothes back on?” Andre asks, frowning, coming in without asking, and closing the door behind him.

“Did you think I’d open door with dick hanging out? What if it was room service? Or Trotzy? Or like random person staying in hotel? Or-?”

“Oh my god, stop talking,” Andre says, crowding into Zhenya’s space and kissing him, hands on either side of his face.

The kiss is rough and heated and it takes Zhenya by surprise. He’s not really thinking when Andre starts walking him backwards toward the bed, not until the back of his legs hit it and he’s stumbling into taking a seat on it.

“I - uh -” Zhenya says, lost for words. “What the fuck?”

“Kuzy, _I want you_ ,” Andre says, clearly exasperated. “God, I sent you like five hundred pictures of my dick, what did you think?”

“That it was accident?” Zhenya asks. His hands are clutching onto the front of Andre’s shirt, and he doesn’t even remember when they’d gotten there. He wants to pull Andre back into him, but he’s still a bit surprised and confused by his up and down emotions.

“Once would’ve been an accident. Or twice. Not like. How many times I did it,” Andre says and his smile has an underlying fondness to it. “I was about to give up and, like, actually talk to you when you finally sent one back.”

“When you didn’t respond to last video I thought I fucked up and read things wrong,” Zhenya admits, and Andre rolls his eyes.

He finally comes closer to Zhenya again, sitting firmly in his lap. Zhenya’s hand goes low down Andre’s back when Andre kisses him again, a little slower this time, but still just as passionately. It’s making Zhenya’s arousal flare up again, and a moan escapes his mouth when Andre nips at his bottom lip.

“I don’t know how much clearer I could’ve made it than sending you so many pictures and _two videos_ just today-”

“Well, you could talk to me like you say earlier.”

Andre pushes Zhenya so he’s lying against the bed and stretches over him. “Well we’re talking now. And I want you, Kuzy, want you to touch me, want you naked like right now. Please.”

It’s more than enough for Zhenya who starts to kiss Andre again.

They shed their clothes quickly, until Zhenya finally, finally has Andre naked in front of him. Zhenya flips them over, straddling Andre’s hips and looking him over. His skin is still tanned from his beach vacation and there’s a bruise forming against his side that Zhenya sort of wants to press down on with his fingers. Andre looks back, unashamed, and smirks.

“Like what you see?”

“Is maybe six out of ten,” Zhenya says lightly and Andre squeezes his sides in retaliation, making him squirm.

“Well, the orgasm I’m going to give you will be a ten out of ten.”

“That’s terrible line,” Zhenya says, and Andre just responds by finally wrapping a hand around his dick.

Andre’s hand is big and warm around Zhenya. The angle must be awkward for him, with the way he’s lying down, but he doesn’t seem to mind, especially not when Zhenya starts breathing more heavily.

“Did you ever jerk off when I sent those pictures?” Andre asks, twisting on the upstroke and making Zhenya keen.

“Yeah, a couple times -” Zhenya admits, his voice low. “Fuck - do it - do it harder -”

Andre listens, stroking Zhenya’s dick more roughly, more like how Zhenya likes it. It doesn’t take long until Zhenya feels his balls tightening and his stomach coiling with heat. He comes suddenly and with a gasp, all over Andre’s chest and stomach, his shoulders still heaving with his orgasm and heavy breathing after.

“Is maybe eight out of ten,” he says when he catches his breath and Andre flips them over again, kissing him roughly.

Zhenya wraps his hand around Andre’s dick this time. He works Andre more slowly, taking his time. He likes the way Andre closes his eyes, how he can’t seem to control the stutter of his hips as Zhenya touches him. Andre is quieter than Zhenya, and he comes with only a sharp breath and a low moan deep in his throat.

Zhenya feels gross, hot and sticky with sweat and Andre’s come, but he doesn’t complain when Andre lays down next to him, steadying his breathing. Zhenya leans over, kisses Andre lightly with fingertips grazing his jaw.

“I’m glad we finally do this,” he says softly and the warmth in Andre’s answering smile makes his stomach flip pleasantly.

\--

**Epilogue**

They never use the word _boyfriends_ explicitly, but Andre starts sitting with Zhenya on the plane, and holding his hand during dinner, and spending more time at Zhenya’s house than his own, so Zhenya supposes that’s what they are.

Andre is dragged out by Christian and Jake and Devo one night and Zhenya tries not to feel too put out when they’d been planning to spend the night together. Instead, he goes over to Sasha’s house uninvited and lets Nastya cook him dinner and he plays with Blaich and tries not to pout too much.

Sasha ends up inviting Dima and Varvara too, and they make a night of it, drinking Sasha’s good vodka because there’s no practice in the morning. It’s a nice distraction and exactly what Zhenya needs.

“Kuzma, why don’t we ever see you anymore?” Nastya asks as she’s pouring Zhenya another drink and Zhenya blushes.

“It’s because Zhenya has a boyfriend now,” Dima answers before Zhenya says, and Zhenya stares at him, betrayed.

“You what? And you didn’t tell me?” Sasha asks, looking even more betrayed than Zhenya feels.

“I didn’t tell anyone!” Zhenya insists, which is true. “How did you even know that?” he asks Dima, and Dima smirks.

“I just know these things. I’m very observant -”

“Andre did send him a dick pic by accident,” Varvara interrupts, “and a very hasty _shit, that was meant for evgeny._ ”

“You’re dating _Burky_?” Sasha says, even more surprised. “Two of my children are betraying me like this?”

“Andre _did what_?” Zhenya splutters pulling out his phone immediately to text Andre.

_you send dima pic of your dick???_ He asks and gets a reply immediately.

_it was an accident!!!_

Zhenya sends him back the thinking face emoji and _that’s what you say to me too_ and Andre replies with a frowning face.

“Stop sexting your boyfriend at the dinner table,” Sasha reprimands.

“This is probably why he didn’t tell you,” Nastya says lightly as Zhenya sticks his tongue out at Sasha childishly.

Sasha covers his face dramatically. “First my sons betray me. Now my wife. I didn’t do anything to deserve this.”

Zhenya rolls his eyes, ignoring Dima and Sasha’s back and forth as Dima starts a long list of reasons why Sasha probably did deserve this. He’s distracted by another text from Andre, this one reading, _don’t worry, you get to see the real thing today ;)_

_your lines still terrible_ he says to Andre and the three dots showing that Andre’s typing pop up immediately.

_yeah, but you love it_.

And Zhenya can’t deny that he definitely does.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and kudos are always appreciated. Follow me on Twitter or Tumblr @tjoshov


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